Seven-Year-Old's Story About Crabs Is Utter Genius

Author image for Meeeeesh
Meeeeesh
Dec 20, 2019 12:00 PM EST

It's true what they say: kids really do say the darnedest things. This woman shared a story she wrote at seven years old in 2000 (holy crap we're old), and honestly it's a true work of art. Move over Shakespeare, Tess is the newest brilliant writer in town. 

Now scroll down to read the story of Tess and her crabs.

Advertisement
  • 01
    Text - Me and my Crabs by Tess April 17, 2000
    via 1forest1
  • 02
    Text - (ohnar dre I have crabs. My biggest one died and I cried. (1)
    via 1forest1
  • 03
    Text - Their names are Jasmine, Pika, and Shell. The one that died was (2) Big Kermie.
    via 1forest1
  • 04
    Text - mee I like to play with them, but sometimes I get pinched and it hurts.ks. (3)
    via 1forest1
  • 05
    Text - It is funy that I laugh The funniest crab is Jasmine because she does cannon-balls into my and clothes and socks. (4)
    via 1forest1
  • 06
    Text - It is so funny that I laugh head off. When I laugh my too hard I get a headache and I have to swallow an you aspirin. eadache (5)
    via 1forest1
  • 07
    Text - Then I come back to my crabs and I say, "Crabs, you gave me a headache." (6) %3D
    via 1forest1
  • 08
    Text - waterhese water My crabs eat crab cakes and I give them hose water. (7)
    via 1forest1
  • 09
    Text - whe They live in a glass 1. Don't touc aquarium. (9) (8) Claws,
    via 1forest1
  • 10
    Text - I will tell you the rules when you have crabs. heir 1. Don't touch their claws. (9)
    via 1forest1
  • 11
    Text - 2. Pick them up by their shells. (10)
    via 1forest1
  • 12
    Text - 3. Don't bother them when they eating. are (11)
    via 1forest1
  • 13
    Text - 7 pts 12 hr Superduperdadjokes via Android O At first I thought this post was going to be about the worst Tinder profile page ever
    via 1forest1

Want More? Follow Us and Add Us as a Preferred Source on Google.

Tags

kids say the darndest things wtf things kids say kids crabs cute facebook story brilliant animals
Scroll Down For The Next Article